The Wedding at Stalisfield.

Posted byStephen ThompsonPosted inUncategorizedTags:, , , , , , , ,
The first recorded miracle is Jesus’ transformation of 120 gallons of spring water into wine at the Wedding in Cana. His mother has rather cheekily suggested that Jesus should take responsibility for replenishing the supply of wine, as the party has been going very well and now the supply has been exhausted. Vines do transform water naturally into wine, but it takes too long when the need is pressing. Our good friend Darren Eagles accurately described in our daughter’s wedding day sermon that Jesus’ first miracle is completely superfluous to the necessity of the occasion. The happy couple are already married, and their marriage is beginning perfectly adequately. It’s simply that the wine – a Jewish symbol for joy- has run out. And there is the clue. In the Kingdom of God, there will be no limits to our collective joy- a so much richer category than ‘happiness’.

We had a wedding at the weekend. Perhaps just another wedding, you might think. But not for me, as I was the father of the bride, and this is the only time I ever get to say that, as our other children are sons. Every wedding is a unique occasion in the sight of God, being the best symbol of the heart intention of God for His whole creation: the First Creation and the New Creation are brought together in the wedding of every husband and bride.

Perhaps this is exactly why the first occasion when the gospels record a creative miracle through the Presence of Jesus is at an otherwise forgotten village in the Galilean countryside called Cana, and where the couple themselves are not named, for they stand for every couple brought together at a wedding, and also for The Final Wedding, when Jesus comes again for His Bride. The details of the ceremony are not recorded, for this is not so important. God is present in blessing and to Bless, which is the ceremonial that matters most, embracing every detail of human ritual and giving the ‘Amen’ from heaven to every sincere vow. Exactly what words were uttered across history by priest, parent and each couple are known only to God. We make our own word to show our love and solemnity as expresses our cultures. As you will know, this blog is set on the purpose of reality and practicality, so I am prepared to share my words with you for your encouragement. They were not written for you directly, but they may encourage fruit in your families, so I will gift them to you as well.

Here’s what I said for my daughter Charis and her new husband Adam, at our family party in a modest hall next to a green in a Kentish village called Stalisfield on top of the North Downs last Saturday evening. Their young friends came in force, and you will note that they’d hired a mobile bar to keep everyone ‘watered’ – as far as I know, it didn’t run dry.

In the Bible, in Genesis 12, God speaks ‘out of the sky’ to one man chosen for some mysterious reason. “Go to another land I will show you… and I will make you a blessing.”  God still does this: I met a guy this week who is proving again that this is a real calling and no whimsy. 

Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today as a consequence of adventurous choices made by four older people some several years ago.  I will certainly let Mrs Claire and Dr Doggett speak for themselves, but for Shon and myself, we continue to be overjoyed that the adventure of faith with our real God in God’s real world that brought us together in the village outside Stoke that was Keele University- this adventure that is continuing into another generation with Charis – unutterably radiant!- and our bright and shiny new son-in-law Adam.  How splendid!

For us, the largely unexplored country was how to grow a Christian marriage with integrity that deals gently with the cultures of Hong Kong and China, with London and Maidstone. Oh my, that’s been a mission! Still getting started on that… For this one of our children we are celebrating today, I see the next chapter in the story of creating a Christian woman.  Charis is determined to grow up, so if you are desperate to get your fix of giggles and laughs in a filmshow of less and less grainy photos from Charis’s childhood, you’ll have to make another date with us, and you are very welcome! 

So I’m reflecting with you today on Genesis 24, which is 67 verses long and so I’ll summarise.  If you got the impression in Genesis 12 that God was only interested in calling the man Abraham, you’ve been totally misled.  His wife Sarah is no understudy, and this should be even more obvious when we consider Rebecca.  Abraham and Sarah’s son Isaac will indeed be needing a wife, and this chapter is about how everyone discovers they are partners with God in finding her.  Abraham sends his manservant to find a suitable bride amongst his long-lost relatives, but this is no crude arranged marriage.  Old man Abraham sends his servant afar off with expectation of the guidance of God, yet there is no talk of ‘picking the right one.’ The young woman herself will be the only proof that matters- her own character, her free will, her agency as a woman, created free within the boundaries of her society.  Is she friendly, open to other people, caring and generous?  Does she know the meaning of an honest day’s work, as every young person should, but so often doesn’t?  Is she comfortable in her own skin as a person- and creative, imagining the better life that we can all live if she makes a gift of herself and puts daily energy into that investment?  God does indeed dearly wish and will to direct our steps, but they ought to be steps along the aisle of life that she initiates of her own generous free will. 

I do hope you know the story.  As the challenge has been put to God, the manservant arrives at the village with his ten very thirsty camels, and out comes Rebecca with her water jar, balanced ever so elegantly on her head, because it is the time of day that all the flocks must be watered.  She quickly responds to their needs, first of all, without reluctance and beyond the basic sense of social duty.  “Here is drink for you, and I will draw and pour water for all your camels- until they are no longer thirsty!”  Have you any idea how much water that is?!

 The text acknowledges this largess. This is the scale of willing ambition that must motivate a person to embrace theology and embark on a career in counselling at the same time: an adventure that can surely only be successful if we know that our God is big enough.

But beyond the business of the animals, there is the wider family.  In short, everyone agrees that Rebecca would be a suitable match for Isaac, but as with wedding speeches, there is a pressing urgency and the servant wants to return to his master.  “Stay for ten days so we can party and say goodbye properly.”  How very Chinese!  In the brevity of the biblical account, it comes down to this. No, not, ‘Is it God’s will?’ Not, ‘Does this stranger want it to be so?’  Not, ‘Who is this weird bloke, I’ve not even met him yet!’  Not because my Mum and Dad want to get rid of me.  The question is put to Rebecca herself, to consciously and deliberately, bravely and boldly to make up her mind and decide in faith for herself: ‘Will you go with this man?’  And into a land and the Destiny that that decision beckons you into.  Of marriage and children and life given into others with creative generosity, that is committed to getting to know people within and beyond the bounds of family, to bless them, to bring balm and even healing. 

Charis, you have received with grace the love and care we have done our best to lavish on you as you have grown up- despite our many shortcomings- and come to thrive through the friendship and fellowship in life of so many, quite a few of whom are here today to rejoice together.  We are discovering that success in human becoming is with our Lord Jesus, and with Him, we bless you on this Day we have made together in God.

Raise your glasses with me, to Charis, and Adam: “‘I will make you a blessing,’ and we will help. ”

By a subtle sleight of hand my glass of water did appear to be changed to ‘wine’ before the eyes of the gathering. Great timing Mr Photographer sir!

To Charis and Adam!

© 2022 Stephen Thompson

Published by Stephen Thompson

Thinking inside the box is to be recommended for many reasons. I am creating this blog in May 2020 as we are encouraged to stay inside our boxes as far as possible, though we are allowed out- encouraged out, indeed- for exercise. By blogging, our thinking can also be allowed out for public exercise. Right now we need new thinking, new exercising of our mental faculties, and collective application of our thinking to the big idea of a healthy collective future. I am trialling my thinking in constructive theology, science and leadership in the light of my experience as a science teacher, theological student and as a representative of the Christian community in the county of Kent, in the UK. I welcome your partnership!

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